...I'm thinkin' that, were it me, I'd pretty much keep this under wraps.
1. Sorry about the whole "depression" thing, Fifi, now sit and stay while I go get my shotgun.
2. The Dog Breed encyclopedia says that the standard poodle can get up to 80 pounds, so maybe Fifi is getting a bad wrap as an absurb French lapdog; apparently a "real" (standard) French Poodle can kick some ass when it wants to.
Oops, 80-pound poodle Fifi is not. Instead Fifi is a Maltese Bichon. You can see Cujo's little cousin here. "Mauled" is a physically impossible descriptor.
Like I said, I'd've kept this one out of the papers & made up a story about a Grizzly Bear or something.
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